Entertainment

Reality TV - Which is Best?


Love it or Loathe it reality TV is here to stay, and it is on the increase. Especially in the states, where they are starting to have a reality show on just about anything that you can mention. But the question is are we getting reality TV overload, and what is good reality TV and what is bad?
Well let's start with the one that really kicked thing off, and that is Big Brother.

Big Brother

Big Brother, now in it's 7th series in the UK, and for some compulsive viewing, for others a complete waste of TV air time. I mean who really watches a bunch of people in their sleep?? Granted some of it is pretty funny, and some of the housemates (Jade Goody in particular) have gone onto bigger things. But for the rest who remembers them now??

The current crop of housemates has a couple of characters in there, and hopefully they will be there to the end, but the others..... There is a sense of cruelty though with this years BB, and that was when they wouldn't allow tourettes sufferer Pete, the letter from home, never seen anyone cry as much. I was also in a flood of tears watching those letters been read out (soppy sod that I am!). But then again Pete is going to go on to bigger and better things *cough* *Wankers!!*. So how do I rate BB, well I would have to give it a 4/10, and that is because there are some parts that are entertaining, but most of the time it's pretty crap.

Pete this years favorite *Wank*

I'm a Celebrity Get me Outta Here!

Now this is entertainment with a capital E, granted they are not exactly A plus celebrities but who cares? To watch any celebrity go through what they do is compulsive TV at the best of times.

If you have never seen the show here is a breakdown, a bunch of celebs are left in the jungle to live for two weeks. Each ay they have to compete in arduous tasks known as Bush Tucker Trials to gain food for the camp. This involves the collection of stars, the more stars they get, the better they get fed. Quite often though these tasks have the celebs going pretty hungry!

But, one of the worst of the Bush Tucker trials has to be the one where the celebs have to eat certain disgusting items, such as green ants, fish eyes, kangaroo bollocks, and most notoriously of all witchiti grubs!

Please don't eat me!

Presented by Ant and Dec (who without the show would be nothing like as good as it is) in great double act fashion. Their comments and glee at watching the celebs in progress, is a joy to watch, probably the best been Paul Burrells trial with snakes and spiders!

So I have to give this one 9/10, nothing is perfect, but this reality show is pretty close!

Hells Kitchen & The F word

F*!K OFF OUT OF MY KITCHEN!

Both shows feature chef Gordon Ramsay, and both are fairly entertaining in their own right, although I prefer Hells Kitchen.

Basically in the F word, it's a group of wannabe chefs cooking for Gordons restaurant clientele and been verbally abused by Gordon. Hell's kitchen is similar, but it involves celebs.

The thing about Gordon is he couldn't give a damn who he insults. In one show a Busty young lady was complaining about the food, and Gordon came over and said "Love the amount you've spent on plastic surgery and you're bothered about paying a few quid for a fucking meal is beyond me!"

I think that the only reason why people tune in is to see the comments of Gordon. Expect strong language, and a few tears. But I give them both 6/10.

There are as I have said loads and loads and loads of reality TV shows, on loads and loads of different subjects. Even strippers are getting their own reality show, to see who is the best or should I say breast?

Is there too much of it on the TV, probably but whilst we have the human instinct of watching people make complete fools of themselves, we will carry on watching.

BB is credited as been the first reality TV program, but for me it was Candid Camera now THAT was funny.

Weekly Question

Immigration - Good or Bad?

OK from now on I am going to be putting up a weekly question for you all to ponder, and hopefully add your comments on. The first of these is probably the most contentious of all issues around today, and that is one of immigration.


Is the UK overrun with immigrants? Do they get treated better than citizens that were actually born and raised in the UK? Do they provide the country with much needed wealth?
Well what ever you answer to those questions you are going to be branded either a racist or a commie loving liberal (If there is such a thing!).
So after hearing that the new government agent dealing with organized crime SOCA (Serious Organised Crime Agency - http://www.soca.gov.uk/ ) believe that you can gain illegal entry into the UK for as little as 150 quid, I thought I would start smacking the hornets nest!
Right here we go....
This country is an island, so as such it is limited to how many people it can take on it, but still we keep allowing people in who are of no benefit to the country, and indeed a lot of the time are a severe burden on the country. Our border controls are a complete joke, and are criteria for entering the country practically non-existent. The whole cabundle needs sorting out, and sorting out NOW!
There are thousands upon thousands of failed asylum seekers, illegal immigrants and people on the run in this country, that this government have failed to deport, indeed this lousy excuse for a government haven't a fucking clue as to how many there really are! Yeah, great tracking at the borders guys!
I will admit that there are a lot of hard working, respectable immigrants that come to the UK looking for work, and who will accept any work offered, for lower wages, some been treated very poorly (another topic for another week), and they are willing to do the shitty work that home grown people would never do.
But then there are others who come here because they know they can sponge of the government and then when they have bled the government dry, they go back to their home country and set themselves up in business, which gives their home country benefits gained from our governments willingness to trip over backwards, and get their votes.
The thing that really grips my shit though is the fact they are able to set up whole communities, that concentrate and cater soley for their fellow countrymen, and have no intention whatsoever to mix and integrate with the 'home' nationals. But we are such a tolerant society we let this happen. If we tried the same sort of thing in their home countries we would be hounded out.

OK enough of the rant as I could go on all day. Here is what I would like to see put in place;

• A Points system introduced so that only skilled/professional workers are allowed access and will be of benefit to the country.
• The applicants MUST be able to speak fluent English and be capable of writing/reading English to a good standard.
• Any serious criminal offence will result in deportation with no right to appeal.
• Employment or promise of employment must be obtained BEFORE the applicant can be allowed to enter the country.
• All illegal immigrants, and failed Asylum seekers will be deported as soon as possible.
• A new border patrol task force to be set up and to be equipped with the latest equipment and tracking devices for preventing illegal immigration.
• Closer ties to be established with other countries to prevent illegal immigration at source.
• No migrant worker to be allowed employment in the immigration service unless they have been legally in the country for a minimum of 2 years.

These are a few of them, there are some more but I don't want to be branded a racist for putting them forward.

Now all I need is for a few comments to see what the rest of you think, and what would be really good is if I could see the other side of the coin by getting a recently arrived immigrants view of things, such as why you came here and what you expect from the country.

Current Affairs

The British Justice System

Or should that be "The British Injustice System"??
A lot has been mentioned recently about the leniency of the sentence handed out to convicted Paedophile Craig Sweeney, not the fact that he got life, but for the fact he was eligible for parole after only 5 years.

5 bloody years for him ruining a 3 year old kid life, her life is going to be full of torment about what happened to her while he has the luxury of prison. Yeah that's right luxury of prison, as that is a pretty easy way to spend time now. I mean think about it, you get free accommodation, free 3 meals a day, the chance to learn different skills such as computer courses and other such things that normally cost a bomb in the outside world, how much for them - nothing!




The only thing that is a problem is that of overcrowding in some prisons, but is it any wonder when our prisons are so soft these days?

The Justice system itself is far to much on the side of the criminal these days rather than that of the victim. But why? Because the criminal always plays the Human Rights card, that's why..."Oh no you can't do that it would infringe his/her human rights!" Well I say they gave up their human rights when the committed an inhuman act.

The Tories want a review of the Human Rights Act, they want to change it so that it is weighted more toward the victim, about bloody time too! But that will only happen should they get in at the next election.

Now the biggest debate of all involves the re-introduction of the death penalty in this country, do gooders and lefty liberals argue, that it is barbaric and doesn't work, also there is too many chances of miscarriages of justice. Bollocks!!! Is what I say, bring back the bloody death penalty now, and here is why:-

We have the means now to prove beyond doubt that someone committed a crime, that is forensic evidence, DNA evidence, satellite surveillance techniques, etc. So no problems there then.

An Actual DNA profile

Here is what I would like to see, a DNA national database that contains the DNA of all the UK's residents. When a child is born part of the bloodtest done has DNA extracted and plead on the Register. Every immigrant entering the country MUST provide a blood sample for DNA purposes (it only needs to be a pin prick on the finger). If they refuse they don't come in. All other residents have the test done over a period of years, if they refuse they are checked out.

Sounds draconian, but it would work, the trouble is it would never happen as it would infringe peoples Human fucking Rights! But consider this, can you honestly say that those bastards that raped a 2 week old baby and took pictures to prove it are in any way HUMAN????? Of course not, so the Human Rights Act cannot possibly apply to them!

So here is Impy's Justice

Any Murder of a Child - Death Penalty

Any other Murder - Death Penalty

Rape of a Child - Castration followed by 5 years in jail, then Death Penalty

Other Rape - Castration or sterilization

Armed Robbery - MINIMUM - 15 years National service + compulsory posting to trouble spot.

Robbery - Assets of criminal to the value of amount stolen x 4 seized and given to victim + 5 years National Service.

GBH - Criminal to receive Lashes depending on severity of GBH.

ASBO's do not work really they are seen as a way out of prison or fines, and are becoming a bit of a status symbol, so don't mollycoddle them give them a bit of the shit they dish out back. Bad Lads Army Bad Lads has shown that this works.

I now await the liberalties amongst you all to have a go, but look at it like this, if you want to stop prison overcrowding, you want to stop the dreadful discipline problems bring back Corporal and Capital punishment.

Following The Imps

Lincoln 3 Leicester 3

Now all I have to go on for this game are the reports generated by other people, so what I want to do is pick the bones from them and try and produce the most bias report possible! :)
So let me start the game took place on Monday 24th - Leicester....

Night-time descended over Sincil Bank although you wouldn't think so in the summer sun, as a Giant of football (Lincoln) prepared to take on the Foxes of Leicester. Yes the team for who Gary Lineker once played had their opportunity to stuff the Imps, but the Imps would have other ideas!
Kick off and both teams took time to adapt to the conditions, Lincoln playing a 4-3-3 formation showing their attacking intent, the Foxes a tried and tested 4-4-2.
The first corner of the match and it went to the Foxes, a scramble in the area, and of all people ex-Imp Gareth McAuley almost scrambled the ball home....but he didn't! The game continued on, then clever link up play between Jamie Forrester and Mark Stallard, almost had the latter slotting the all home, only quick feet and thinking by the Leicester shot stopper Rab Douglas denied the new boy. That was in the 14th minute, but the Imps would not be denied for very long.... In the 18th minute 4 players conspired to give the Imps the lead, impressive trialist Ryan Amoo (no cow noises please!), Forrester and Stallard got the ball to Frecklington who smacked it from fully 25 yards... a hand got to it from Douglas, but the power of the shot took it in - Imps 1 Foxes 0....Cue jubilant scenes by the City fans.
Four minutes later a bit of trickery from Danny Bacon, who flicked the ball with the outside of his boot into the path of Scott Kerr, who skipped past a challenge from city old boy McAuley, before placing the ball calmly into the back of the net...2-0! And only 22 minutes gone.
Now the Foxes were upset as they looked for an immediate reply, Lee Beevers saving the day by diverting a Josh Low shot behind for a corner.
Then on the 32nd minute it was a chance for more city cheers, Frecklington playing Stallard through, who wrong-footed Douglas and was ready to pull the trigger when Douglas had no option to bring him down...Penalty! No sending off though, it was a friendly after all. Up stepped Jamie Forrester.....Magnificent save from Douglas, but he couldn't get to the rebound before Forrester who pile drived the ball through Douglas's legs and into the net. 3-0 to the side from League 2, against their Championship opponents.
Now Leicester were well pissed off, and those frustrations showed when Foxes Chris O'Grady made a late challenge on Imps skipper Adie Moses, referee Andy Woolmer had words, but Moses had the "I'll get you for that" look in his eye.
A change of personnel after the break saw Alan Marriot, Luke Foster and Paul Mayo on for Simon Raynor, Adie Moses and Jeff Hughes, and two minutes after the restart Leicester had pulled one back through Chris "Late tackler" O'Grady, after a clever ball from the right dicected the Lincoln defence.
Unbelievably, it was 3-2, two minutes later when substitute Elvis "Uh Huh" Hammond scored from 8 yards from a O'grady ball swung in from the left.....Don't Panic! was the cry by the city faithful.
Two more chances then fell to Leicester, before McAuley thought he had scored against his old club. But his effort ruled out for offside.
Then on 78 minutes the third Leicester goal came Elvis "Than you ver much Uh HuH" Hammond drifted in a cross to the city box, and an attempted header back to his keeper by 1st Year Pro Phil Watt seemed to suggest that Mariot was 6ft 6 tall and 6 foot wide, as the ball neatly went into the left corner, and off the inside of the post to settle in the back of the City net 3-3.
Not much more action of note, especially as Leicester played a bit better toward the end, so the game finished and both sets of fans went home happy, fully entertained, and with at least some positives from a pulsating friendly game of footy!

Entertainment

Reality TV - Bad Lads Army

I don't know if any of you guys watch this at all but I think that it is great entertainment. Watching these so called hard-cases reduced to tears gives a certain sense of pleasure, as they begin to feel how their victims have felt.

For those unfamiliar with the program, a basic synopsis is a bunch of reprobates, criminals, and lets just say 'bad lads' are taken through an army basic training regime 1950's style.
Now not only does this involve the lads having to wear the uniforms of the 1950's they are also given punishment beatings like the 1950's.

To make the series work you have to have some good characters in charge of the sections Blue (Cpl Nauyokas) and Red (Cpl Murray). Both have their own way of dealing with things, but both can shout the hair of your head, and one things the lads learn early on is not to piss these two off.

Cpl Murray & Cpl Nauyokas

This time around they are doing Para-training, and the sight of seeing probably the fattest para-recruit in history been fooled into jumping off what he thinks is a 10ft building blindfolded, when in reality it is 2 inches is indeed a sight to see.

But no-one should ever piss off Provost Sgt Tim Weston, he is mean sod for sure, and is someone I'd hate to bump into in a dark alley.
He is in charge of the Beastings that seem to occur on a frequent basis. Here he is in action with a couple of lads, been punished for some misdemeaner or other. That is a big Pacing Stick that he is rattling between their heads. :)

"You 'Orrible little F*!KERS!!!!!!

Now a lot of people condemn the program, but lets look at it this way, these thieving, cheating waste of space gits, are off the street. They are going through hell compared to the luxury of prison. They are also learning respect for others, teamwork, respect for themselves. They are also learning humility, now we are in the 4th series, and already after only a week of all the punishments, all the shit and all the physical and mental abuse they suffer, there are some of them saying they want to stay!

In the last episode we saw them ALL munch on a grub/worm/locust omelet, because they are beginning to understand what it means to be someone.

If I had my way, each and every serial criminal of this age 18-24, would have two choices, prison or 2 years National Service (50's style!). For those who say it doesn't work, after series 3, they had an Army recruitment van turn up outside the barracks, and out of those that were left 14 signed up.

So does it 'cure' these bad lads, I'd like to say too bloody right it does!

Following the Imps

My First Game in 11 years....

This was it on July 22nd 2006, I was allowed (Thanks Jackie!), by my wife to actually go and see a footy match for the first time since we were married. It also corresponded with our 11th Wedding anniversary, so may be her indoors saw it as a gift for me (even though entry was FREE!!!!).

The game was to take place at Rockingham Road home to the mighty Kettering Town FC

Once managed for a while by Paul "Gazza" Gasgoine, this was going to be fun. So taking my father along with me (An Arsenal fan...well someone has to be), we got to the ground at 2:20, and went behind the goal to soak up the atmosphere. The storm clouds far away adding a nice coolness to the air, the father-in-law worried we would get wet should it rain, so I asked a steward if we could move to undercover should it pour, the response "No problem".

Fifteen minutes before kick off, and they moved us to the shelter of the side terrace, as they were expecting a bit of a storm, plenty of room as there were only about 30 of us City fans there.At 10 to 3 it started to spit, by 3pm (Kick of time) it was a deluge, you've seen films of storms at sea, well Kettering had become Brighton in the hurricane season. The noise was deafening the site of the players dragging themselves on the pitch pitiful. The camera's and Mobile phones were recording things for prosperity.

Kick off began, and almost straightaway the ball got stuck in a puddle, the game carried on then 2 players went up for the ball, when the splashed down, the judges gave them 3.6,2.8,3.2 and 3.5 for artistic merit, they lost points for rating too bigger splash....still the game carried on, then a collision, and an Imp (Colin Cryan) injured. On swam the physio, dipped the magic sponge into the pitch and re-soaked Colin. Ohh Dear!

A bigger Oh dear came next, reserve keeper Simon Raynor came to clear a simple looking ball, he went to kick it as hard as he could upfield, but only ended up kicking the raindrops, as the ball skidded beneath his foot and headed toward the goal. Luckily, he scrambled back and kicked away the ball out of the puddle it had stuck in before the Kettering player could touch it.

Then at 15:10, the ref blew his whistle, and gathered the players around, as they huddled around the players tunnel, the announcer said "The referee will wait 15 minutes for the weather to clear before proceeding"....Weather to clear??? This was a Squall at sea, if they had any sand on the pitch, it could be a beach! 15:12....The announcer says "Owing to Public Safety and the Dressing rooms been flooded the game has been cancelled"
Boo's all round, and disappointment all round, but Why?? you couldn't play in that, it was free to get in?!!
But for me it was heartbreaking, an 11 year wait to see 11 mins of footy from my heroes, I may make it to my 20th Wedding Anniversary and if I do can I see 20 minutes this time???

Both Pictures (C) of KAPPA PICTURES

Entertainment

DVD Covers

As can be seen in my profile I like to try to create DVD covers for films. Sometimes before they have come out on DVD, sometimes to see if I can do a better job than others have done.

To check out my covers click Continue



Pirates of the Caribbean 2


X-men 3 The Last Stand


Aliens



Bad Lads Army


Big Brother 7

Fun Template


Slap Her She's French

Hogfather DVD label


Terry Pratchett's Hogfather

****NEW****

SAW 3 Extreme Edition

Current Affairs

The scrapping of the CSA

So the government have announced that they are to scrap the Child support agency and replace it with something a little more easier to manage, but have yet to come up with a name for it.

Ever since it's induction this piece of shit department has caused nothing but problems, not only for dads but also for mom's and worse of all for the kids it was set up to help, even the Beeb ( http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/4020399.stm ) are dissing it!

You can't blame people though, I mean listening to radio 5Live the other day 98% of the callers had horror stories regarding the agency. From unpaid monies to the agency staff not knowing their arse from their elbow, these were all comments coming in.

So what was wrong with the old court system?? At least with that people knew where they stood, and you would normally get payments made because they were in effect court orders. But with this agency, the dads or moms could be 'absent' for the whole of the child's life, and there would be no recourse of action. Sure there were a few problems with the court system, but then again the whole of the justice system in this country sucks anyway.
How many spouses have committed suicide because of ludicrous requests from the agency?? How many partners on in poverty because of it??? How many kids have suffered because of it?
The simple answer is no-one knows!!!
But now the government are thinking of tagging non-conformers, confiscating passports, and even sending around Bailiffs.....Like I can REALLY see the police being able to enforce this!

The CSA has been one of (if not the biggest) the worst ever mistakes made by consecutive governments (the Tories bought it in, and Labour kept it), but don't heap all the blame on the employees, it's their managers, and the managers managers that are the problem. Although the biggest problem is why the fuck has it gone on for so long??????

Politics

How is Labour still in????

Ok the question must now be answered, how the 'kin hell has Tony Blair been in power for so long???? That false smiling, conniving, thieving, hypocritical piece of shit has been running out of time for ages now, but he still holds on.

He has had his fingers in more pies than Little Jack Horner, and has made just about more gaffes then any other leader, his popularity has plummeted, and so has his standing on the international stage.

Take his parties record recently on immigration for instance, I mean they haven't got a bloody clue how many illegals are here, how many Asylum seekers, and how many failed Asylum seekers awaiting deportation! For fucks sake, the government even admitted that their estimate of 30, 000 illegals could be a slightly conservative estimate....GOOD GOD, it's even more Conservative than Maggie Thatcher!!!!!!

But that is another topic, for yours truly to cover.....

Now what about the cock-ups (quite literary!!! ;) ) from John "I've got two Jags and I'll use the buggers to travel 2 miles if I bloody well want too!" Prescott. Three strikes and you're out???? By Christ he has had a whole 9 innings and he is still there!!! But his secretary has conveniently gone?!

And as for the home office........ lets just say they couldn't have made more of a mess of things if they were the messy mess, mess co-ordinators from the messy department for the messy party of messyville!

The Health Department???? Waiting times are down I would agree, but complaints are up, compensation payments for incorrect/badly carried out procedures are up. Why??? Government targets!!! WTF is that all about, the hospitals have to meet certain targets in order to avoid penalty payments, and as such the nurses and doctors have got there work cut out for them to do a good job. Consequently, they suffer, and in time so will the NHS.

Once again that is another topic...........

Just one thing to say on this now....

Taxi for Tony & Co........mind you we have to call for a taxi as the Public Transport system isn't very.......no yet another subject ;)

Current Affairs

The Home Owners Package

So from next year Home owners will no longer have to include a survey of their house as part of a Home owners package. Our fantastic (please!) government have done a U-turn and decided against it.

WTF! Did they propose it for in the first place????


There was nothing wrong with the current system that had the buyers paying the mortgage companies or Estate Agents for the survey to be done. In a lot of cases the Estate Agent or Mortgage company would pay for the survey themselves thus wavering the cost to the home buyer.


They (the bunch of thieving, lying, hypocritical arseholes known as the government) have chosen however to make compulsory an Energy efficiency rating for the sellers property. Now I only know about that, because we had our loft re-insulated to meet the current standards, and had cavity wall insulation put in, and was told about it 2 years ago.

But for fucks sake, how many other ordinary people know about this?? Not too many I will wager! Why?? Because there has been bugger all advertising about it. And why has there been so little advertising about it??? Cause the government know that it will be unpopular and don't want to talk to much about it.

The thing is how do we the 'normal' 'average' citizen determine what the figures in this Efficiency rating relate to? I mean is an energy efficiency rating of 75% be much different from a 70% rating? Or will they be using ratings from 1 to 10, or 0.0 to 1.0??

Who knows????

Once again it's bollocks!!!

Tony Blair's going to be OK though, he spouts that much hot air, his house doesn't need any heating!

About me

Hi everyone,

Just a little bit about myself, I am a featurely challenged (ugly!) male aged 40, married to Jackie. We have two kids, Chloe 6 and Adam 2, that are absolutely gorgeous one minute and little gits the next.
I am into the paranormal, and designing covers for DVD's,CD's etc.

I work as a commissioning engineer with a firm called Thermoteknix, that sells thermal imaging camera's worldwide, so as such I have seen quite a bit of the world.

Also as such I have quite a few opinions of the world which are pretty controversial as you will soon see.